Match Reports (Current Season)

20th January 2018

Ladies 1s

Ladies 1s travelled to deepest darkest Kent to play top of the table Canterbury. It all started so well when Katherine Abbie forgot her stick Amy Clayton forgot the warm up balls and Lucy Butcher tried to overtake an ambulance with blues and twos on.

As the lowest scoring team in the league we devised a song to celebrate the many goals we would score today as we lined up. We’ll keep everyone in suspense and save that one for next week. We actually started pretty well against good oppo and won the first short corner, but then after a bit of pressure we lost our way a bit and conceded shortly before half time.

The team talk by Uzair Pandor at half time was strongly worded…to say the least. To be fair the team responded well and the defence were fan bleedin tastic, keeping out a string of short corners and more pressure. Mog made an amazing save that even the oppo applauded. Lucy Butcher then literally threw her body on the line to stop a goal but they scored from the resulting flick. Boo. Highlight of the game was Laura Ayre forgetting where the sideline was and playing the ball a good half a metre off the pitch.

So there we have it…a 2 nil loss but an improvement on the last time we played them. Man of the match Mog. Dod me. Roll on next week!

Ladies 2s

Ladies 2’s played County Wanderers. We lost 3-1

MOM was Lucie another fine player from the youth section

DOD was Michelle Twitchett (again) & Nicky Haden-Homer for their determination to keep the ball out of the goal

Ladies 3s

Ladies 3’s played 2nd place Crostyx away today. We kept it 0-0 in the first half, triggering a few classic oppo temper tantrums. Second half we scored a goal that wasn’t a goal, missed a penalty flick, Sarah nailed a cracker of a short corner (and apologised a lot for it), and Minty was a one legged hero in goal. Final score 4 – 1 to Crostyx, but that doesn’t do us justice. Let’s call it 3-2 instead?

Ladies 4s

Ladies 4s played against Havering 4s, at home yesterday in the early drizzle. This made sticking our numbers on our shirts near impossible – when is our kit order arriving please!?!

We beat Havering 4s in the first half of the season and it was a tough match so we were looking forward to it.

This time we were without our marvellous Captain and it showed – Although to be fair both teams started with only 9 players on the pitch, our reduced numbers took us by surprise and we were a bit disorganised, conceding a goal in the first 10 mins. WF made it to 10 players just before half time and we were able to return to something like our planned formation, and Di put the ball in the goal to equalise.

Havering had some highly skilled individual players, but we played as a team and as always it was good fun.

Youth player Charis joined the team for her first adult match, and fitted in as if she’d been with us all season. She was voted well deserved player of the match and we’re looking forward to her coming back!

Final score was 1 – 1

Goal Scorer : Dilukshi Leanage

Player Of the Match : Charis Owen

Men’s 1s

Men’s 1s lost 2-0 last week against Peterborough 2s after an average display. Made up for it today with a cracking 2-1 win against an in-form Havering side.

As is well known, I dont give out praise lightly, but 2 absolute belters today. One unstoppable first time power-slap from the edge of the D from Ben Norton, then an audacious lob-hit from Jonathan Jones over the keeper for a 2-0 lead early doors. They got one back but didn’t deserve anything.

Men’s 2s

The Men’s 2s played top of the league Chelmsford today. We lost 2-0 and gave a great account of ourselves.

No subs, no sun but bags of effort and a couple chances to nick the game. We pegged them back til the final ten mins, where they scored the first of their two goals. Rob Humphrey’s teeth of steel could not stop their first goal. For the record, Robs teeth are intact. The second goal came with the final touch of the game.

We looked dangerous on the break and threatened to upset top of the league, so very encouraging signs!!

Props to Matt o Hara for his season debut, Alex Pooles for fighting through the manflu and Kieran for solid defending.

PoP to Vinay Chana for weeks in exile, crimes against wardrobes and bringing my fan club. (All debatable reasons)

MoM to Yogi Patel for some blinding saves and managing to cobble together 11 players (several external factors!)

Great effort and performance. Onwards to next week’s double header. Someone better call Sky Sports!

Men’s 3s

Match report vs Wapping. Inspiration from Vinay Chana

Playing with the dampest of conditions, we had to face a tough battle, in the capital of westeros. Forest where reunited with traveler travis, from his trips in the far east with the dothraki (Essos (Vietnam)) we looked to have a strong army. With a prelude of uncertainty surrounding the unity of our team, due to yogi littlefinger sabotaging our crown, we remained fused.

With the battle imminent, forest were still missing important parts of the puzzle and although wapping poor league form would suggest an easy victory; the combination of a mercenary army and referee witch craft has contributed to previous defeats. But this Forest team is much more unified, organised and motivated than it was back then.

We began shaky and uneasy. Wapping well organised and drill trapped us in our castle. But our walls strong and firm they failed to penetrate. It looked like our control of the crown was destined to falter. But in hour of need our leader, Tywin frith salem, rode into battle. With the hound (Adam) leading the line we created some chances put zilch where converted.

The second half was dominated by forest after having fathomed of the consequences that defeat would have to our promotion.

In this battle Jon, possessed with the passion and determination of tyrion lannister, dominated his sector of the of field and leading it when Ben was circumstanced ot the battle ground. Immy played the role of Ser bronn of blackwater, fighting with immense skill and precision whilst possessing confidence even in onerous situations. Kam operating the role of grand maester pycelle, function as the wise consenti of the team,lending unlikely chances from behind the wall we we were then able to launch our counter attacks via the cavalry out wide.

Mid way through the second half, I won a short corner. This was our opportunity to launch our secret weapon. Ben flicks it to Adam who launches the wildfire onto Morgans stick to hit it into the net

Final score 1-0

See you next year 2’s

Men’s 4s


Men’s 5s

Due to illness I had the pleasure of captain the 5s today against havering .We had the majority of possession with everyone given 100% playing some wonderful hockey but unable to find the back of the net so at half time it was 0-0. The second half we carried on with the same mind set but as we pilled on the pressure havering manged to get a rare break away and scored we never gave up. However, luck was against us in the last couple of seconds havering got a short corner so the game ended 2-0 to havering .The way everyone is starting to play I’m sure we will start to win games


The Otters started poorly defensively and conceded from three early short corners against an experienced East London side. A goal from Jack got us back in it, but we let in another on the stroke of half time. Defensively reorganised we had the better of the second half, and three efforts were cleared off the line but the only additional goal came from our opposition for a final 1-5 scoreline.

Faith Newland